Mr. SMART

Kat KFC tadi Ann citer satu story hangaaaaaaaaaaaaat tak ingat punya today.
Ingat lagi tak aku penah citer pasal COO HR aku yg ado tu? Ha, today ada sorang lagi pi hantar email layang kat internal mail company. Tak semua boleh baca. Tapi member aku sorang tu memang kaw, siap print lagi. Aku pun sepantas kilat menfotostate.
Memang kena sebijik-sebijik atas batang hidung dia, walaupun hidung dia sebenarnya takde batang. Pesek semacam. So sila baca apa yang budak ni hantar kat email :

HOW TO BE Mr. SMART

S - Spell out / Say (Say / Spell out how good you are and not proof how good you are)

M - Multi Task / Master (Never master in what you do. Be MULTI TASK)

A - Always / Assume (Always assume you are the best)

R - Relation (Don't build good relation with your collegues)

T - Think / Talk (Don't think before you do anything coz you are the SMARTEST)


Here are a short story that I want to share and also a proof on how to be Mr. SMART!

One day, Mr.SMART join his brother in law's company. He started to SPELL OUT how good he is in front of everybody. But we he never know is, just by SPELLING it OUT loud he can't convince people. What we need are proof.

Things become worse when he implement MULTI TASK system. You are MULTI TASK coz you are not good at anything. You can't MASTER in what you are doing therefore you need to be MULTI TASK. We believe we are good in what we do. We even got a Degree, Masters or even Doctor.

Ha..ha..the most funny thing is he ALWAYS ASSUME he is the best. Never listen to people's opinion coz he is the best. Never build good RELATIONS with your collegues coz you'll be accused of trying to boicott the company. Nevermind if no one wants to join you for lunch coz you are the best.

Last but not least. Don't THINK before you do coz you are the SMARTEST.

That is what we see with our own eyes on how to be Mr. SMART, and BELIEVE us, it WORKS!

The moral behind this story is the SMARTEST move is to hide under your brother in law's shelter and guess what? Nobody dare to touch you. Always assume that people don't know what happen to you outside the shelter.

ps : pls keep to yourself we heard that contract at ASTRO not renew and resign from OCBC cos you dont get cooperation from staff.

Anyway, what we hear might not be true. If you are so ggod why not come out from the shelter and try to build your own career in the real world.

Oh GOD up there. Please see and understand what is happening. Please listen to our prayers and help us down here.

Mr. STUPID


Jap..jap..HUAHAUAHUAHAUAHAUAHUAHAUAHUAHAUAHA
Macam nak terkeluar anak tekak aku gelak. Tu la..implement lagi benda yang ntah hape hape kat opis. Ape ko ingat ko buat benda-benda tu semua benda-benda bijak dan memenuhi wawasan ke? Tolooooooooooong la. Kalau aku la jadik kau, sure anak aku dah cop aku bodoh.

Walaupun email makhluk halimunan ni agak broken inggelishnya di sana sini, tapi intipatinya aku sangat sangat sukeeeeeeeeee. Gembira membacanya. Tabik spring aku kat Mr. STUPID ni.

Sampai je opis tghri tadi aku baca email, si COO HR ni amik half day leave petang. Tu gi buat police report la tu. Lantak ko la. Kalau dulu parking lot dia kena letak kat tempat khas. Baru ada 'ong'. Bila dah jadik a few incidents, tau pulak rasa insecure. Terus pi alih keta betul2 depan pintu opis. Awat hang?? Mana pi ko punya 'ong' tu? Pastu siap boleh pesan kat receptionist tolong tengok-tengokkan keta dia. Kalau nampak orang duduk dekat-dekat ngan keta dia cepat2 bagitau. Hok olohhh orang tua ni. Ko ingat receptionist tu balaci ko? Banyak lagi keje dia nak buat. Kot takde keje sangat pun baik dia gayut kat tepon dari mengadap keta ko.

Tu la, nak sangat buat pembaharuan kat kompeni kan? Pembaharuan yang tak penting ko saje buat-buat. Baik ko gi 'baru'kan muka ko. Jadik cam muka Mike Myers pun dah kira alhamdulillah.

Bila aku baca balik apa halimunan ni tulis rasa betul gak. Dia ni umur baru 31 tapi dah penah keje kat macam2 company besar (kononnnnnn la). Ntah-ntah kelentong. Astro la, OCBC la. Keluar dari company besar masuk company kecik? Company yang bagi benefit 1 out of 10? Logik ke?

Yang si abang ipar ni pulak, dok bawak masuk segala kaum kerabat bini dia. Aku tunggu masa je dia umumkan nak bawak mak metua dia masuk. Kot boleh jadik tea lady ke.

Aku rasa big bos aku ni dah tension benda macam ni boleh jadik kat kompeni. Tapi nak buat camana kan, dah dia sendiri yang bawak masuk adik ipar tanpa sebarang interview. Takkan nak buang lak. Tak rugged la jilat ludah sendiri kan. Hambikkkk.